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You are a role model for your daughter. You are their first teacher. Your role is to provide them with the tools they need to deal with various situations at different ages + stages in their life.
You want to help them come up with appropriate responses to situations so that it leads to positive outcomes. Your role model status becomes even more important when you have a defiant daughter. Modeling appropriate behavior can make things easier on you + your child.
What Makes Defiant Daughters Different
A truly defiant daughter may suffer from a condition called Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD). This is more complex than just being stubborn.
A daughter that suffers from ODD is disagreeable in the extreme + defiance is on a daily (or almost daily) basis rather than the occasional defiance some children exhibit. Defiant daughters tend to break the rules, talk disrespectfully + repeat annoying behaviors on a regular basis.
Traditional types of discipline often fuel the anger + irritability of a defiant daughter. Parents often find themselves on a perpetual search for new ways of handling the situation.
Here are three ways you can model appropriate behavior for your defiant daughter.
#1 Practice what you preach
To help the help the defiant daughter + her family, behavioral disorder professionals can offer effective methods to help parents problem-solve, decrease negativity, manage anger + increase social skills. There are also family sessions to discuss how the issues affect each household member.
In addition, parents can make things better by modeling the behaviors they want their daughter to emulate. Defiant daughters have a problem dealing with their emotions. Looking at their parents examples can assist them in making the best choices.
#2 Practice handling adult conflicts
You have many opportunities to practice conflict resolution with the adults around you as a way to model this behavior for your daughter. If your daughter hears you yelling at the customer service person when you have an issue, your daughter won’t think twice about yelling at you + others when an issue arises.
Instead of becoming loud or aggressive, learn to communicate with others calmly + quietly.
#3 Wait patiently + quietly
Have you waited in line for a long time because of a slow checkout person? Don’t mutter about them under your breath + then smile at them when you get to the head of the line. Resist giving people dirty looks as well. Waiting is a part of life.
Practice waiting patiently + quietly. You feel better in the end + you set the standard for your child when you model the behavior you expect to see in them.
The earlier your child learns + masters this skill, the better off she is going to be.